Monday, June 21, 2010

Let me count the grey hairs....

SO....we went to the peri 2 weeks ago and saw that Eli's cord was NOWHERE near his head or chest or shoulders...all nicely bundled by his belly. With that great news I decided that we wanted a 3D US and we had it this afternoon. What is the first thing we see? A CORD by his FACE...not just by it, floating above it. Apparently I have excessive fluid enough to allow things to float around and for the tech to measure Eli to make sure he is within normal growth range. (He is, by the way) When we saw the cord I felt like someone kicked me in the stomach. I couldn't believe it. The tech saying "don't worry about's nothing to even think about"....really lady??? Thats what US tech said about Sage's cord the morning of the day she was born. I was shaken, sad, sorry we had gone for the US at all and just plain scared.

Then I realized that this was Eli reminding me that while it was good I'm trusting birth again, I needed to remember that this was HIS journey...he knows how and when and in what way he will be born. I know it will be gentle, perfect, and in his perfect way....I just need to remember that I can't control everything......and that's the hardest part.


  1. I pray that everything continue to go well.

  2. i found your blog thru a comment you left on another blog of someone who has lost a child. i lost one of mine at 20 weeks and miss him terribly; i can't imagine how hard this has been. i wanted to let you know i read your birth story and you wrote it so well; what a fitting tribute to your beautiful Sage; i am so sorry you and your family had to go through this; thank you for writing it down and thank you for working so hard to donate Sage's organs.
    charleston sc